I See (Little Sister)

from Arrivals by jason chu

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The physical Arrivals album comes as a special-edition 22-page unbound magazine. 11 cards each feature a previously-unpublished photograph from my childhood and travels illustrating a track on the album, and on the reverse is a poem, quote, or story further exploring that song's theme - only found here, never to be reproduced elsewhere!

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lyrics

Little sister,
I see you staring at the Kpop videos
and practicing their moves
Your, hips swing and heels groove but
When their eyes flare yours can’t follow

and I’m sorry but I couldn’t help but notice you swallow
Your disappointment
And I hope you know that it’s no BB Cream ointment, no
mascara halos that make your face glow, no
angels aren’t defined by the radius around their pupils

Little sister, I saw you
Laughin at jokes about Asians’ poor vertical vision
Your, smile was nervous, lacking purpose, hiding curses behind derision
Thinking, if you are in on the joke, you won’t be cast out by it
But I’ve had to learn: it’s not worth the buy-in, if what I’m buyin is so biased that it defines the lines of my eyelids as noncompliant

And I’ve seen you cryin in frustration that your eyes aren’t in syndication,
Twenty-four but in our nation your figure’s figured as teenager
So you curse genetic make-up and replace it with foundation
But that make-up couldn’t make one tenth of what our parents gave us!

INTERLUDE
What they say
I take it all
What you say
I take it all

Little sister, I’ve seen the ads from New York to Hong Kong
Carnival mirror images of women to become
They call you plain if you don’t dress up; if you do, you’re labeled fake
Either exotic geisha or awkward honor student brain
And freedom from your baggage feels an awful lot like shame
One thing I’ve learned: in lose-lose situations, you only win the game by never playing
(fermata)

So why play?

(arpeggios start)

It never stops: demands from others always keep comin around
If you’re slim, they call you skinny; if you’re not, they count the pounds
But opinions only matter if you value what they hold.
And all their money and attention weighs nothing next to your soul

And that’s worth more than Mastercard or surgery in Seoul
I’ve seen you shine, and when you do, you get more bright than grandma’s gold
You got a goal that you can hit that no one else could ever do
And when you’re in your element, no irony can tarnish you

So shout outs to my sister whose vision don’t need prescription
Who knows her confidence isn’t based on male ambition
Or the gaze of hating eyes who want to chisel hers away
Because I see you, little sister - but more important?
You see
your own
face.

credits

from Arrivals, released September 2, 2016
Produced by Joe Kye.
Engineered by Sean Stack at Fat Cat Studio (Sacramento)
Written and performed by jason chu
Additional vocals by Emily Chen